Disclaimer: Paramount owns Christine and Spock and I am just borrowing Dr. Suess's prose. None of this is for making money. It is posted strictly for the enjoyment of Star Trek fans. I will not make any money on this, I promise! Copyright 2000 by Catherine Kay.

One Shirt Two Shirt Red Shirt Blue Shirt

Catherine Kay

"One Shirt"

"Two Shirt "

"Red Shirt "

"Blue Shirt."



"Black Shirt"

"Blue Shirt"

"Old Shirt"

"New Shirt"



"This one has a little star"

"This one has a little car"



"Say! What a lot of shirts there are!"



"Yes, some are old and some are new."

"Some are borrowed and some are crewed."



"Some are thin and some are fat."

"The fat one has a yellow hat."



"Some are happy and some are sad and some are very, very bad."

"Why are they sad and glad and bad?"

"I do not know, perhaps a fad."



"Some go high and some go low."

"Some zip fast and others slow."



"Not a single one is like the other."

"I don't know why. But oh! oh! brother."



"This one's colors like to run."

"They run, run, run in the hot, hot sun."

"Oh me! Oh my! Oh me! Oh my!"

"What a lot of crazy dyes go by."



"Some have two sleeves and some have four."

"Some have six sleeves and some have more."

"Where do they come from? I can't say."

"But I bet they will cost ten month's pay."



"From there to here,"

"From here to there."

"Funny Shirts are everywhere."



There was a long silence in the conference room as they all stared at Christine Chapel.

Finally, Admiral Kirk broke the silence, "Uh ... Ms. Chapel? How long have you been up looking at possible new uniforms for Starfleet?"

"Ah...well...I was up with the twins again last night. They have colic. I guess I have been up quite a lot with them. Spock has been reading Dr. Suess to them while I walk the floor. It's the only thing that seems to help. I stayed up after they went down to finish my research and put together my report. Why ? Is something wrong with it?" she said obviously exhausted.

Kirk shook his head and grinned. "Not a thing wrong with it Christine."

Dr. McCoy couldn't help adding, "If you're the Cat In The Hat!"

Kirk kicked him from underneath the table.